Why do you need banners

Why do you need banners?

The child rises hysteria if he did not bought a new toy? Holds with other children if I don’t like something? Then we should explain to him what prohibitions are.

Universal delusion: a child who does not know the prohibitions cannot be called free, because he becomes a hostage of his own gusts and emotions, and you will not call him happy, because he lives in constant alarm. The child who is granted to himself does not have another action plan, except to satisfy their desire immediately. I wanted something? Immediately took. Something unhappy? Immediately hit, broke or broke.

"If we are not limited to children, they will not learn to put the borders themselves. And depending on their desires and gusts, – explains the family psychotherapist Isabelle Fiyosa (Isabelle Filliozat). – Do not know how to control yourself, they experience a constant anxiety and suffer from a sense of guilt. The child could argue like this: "If I want to torment the cat, what will hurt me? After all, no one never forbid anything to me. ".

Why do you need banners

Without establishing prohibitions, we contribute to the fact that the child perceives the world as a place in which they live according to the laws of force. If I’m stronger, then overcome enemies, and if it turns out that weaker? That is why children who are permitted by everything often experience fears: "How can the father, who is not able to force me to follow the rules, to protect if the rule violates someone else against me?" "Children intuitively understand the importance of prohibitions and themselves demand them, provoking parents with their hysterias and miscelves to take some measures, – Increases Isabelle Fiosa. – Do not obey, they are trying to put the borders and, as a rule, do it through the body: fall to the floor, causes themselves. The body limits them when there are no other frames. But besides the fact that it is dangerous, these borders are ineffective, because the child is not taught. ".

Bans help to regulate relationships in society, allow us to peacefully coexist and communicate with each other. The law is an arbitration judge to which they are addressed to resolve conflicts without resorting to violence. It is respected and observed everything, even if there is no "guards of order" nearby.

Why do you need banners

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